At a recent client event, we were asked to share an interesting fact about ourselves. These kinds of questions always catch me off guard- I’m a mom of two young children so there aren’t a whole lot of interesting things going on in my day to day life. I went with my default- I love to camp! Considering this is a pretty standard hobby- Brad quickly reminded me (and everyone else at the event) that I also love cheeseburgers. Far more interesting fact.
But then again- don’t most people enjoy cheeseburgers? But when I say I love cheeseburgers- I mean, I really love them. REALLY. My husband and I have spent the last 3 years eating our way through the best burgers in the Twin Cities, and I have a tried-and-true criteria and evaluation method in place. I’m going to let you guys in on a little secret- my Top 5 List.
Before we get to that- what lands a burger in the top 5? Well, first, we are looking at one specific type of burger, what I believe to be the true measure of a classic burger. It needs to be a double-patty smash burger, with American cheese and pickles. It may have some sort of sauce, and it may have onions (but they MUST be cooked!). We aren’t talking about the fancy burgers with seven different toppings and every trendy, over-hyped ingredient of the moment. These have a time and place… but they don’t belong on this list. I’m talking about simplicity. The quintessential American Cheeseburger.
When it comes to ranking these burgers, there are a few things I consider:
- Bun- Is it buttery? Toasted? Fresh? Does it fall apart or hold up throughout eating the burger?
- Patties- Is there a good sear on the outside, but the meat is still tender? Is it seasoned well?
- Cheese- Is it melted to the gooey, artificial goodness we expect of American cheese? Is there enough, but not too much?
- Pickles- Is there a good crunch? Are they sweet, or savory?
- Sauce- If there is one, does it overwhelm the burger or enhance it?
So, now that you know the method to the madness, I present to you- my personal Top 5 burgers in the Twin Cities!
#5- Bebe Zito Ice Cream
Bebe Zito Ice Cream was originally a pop-up burger joint run out of an ice cream shop, only on the weekends. Sounds a little crazy, but they worked MIRACLES out of that ice cream shop kitchen. They have since expanded to a couple additional locations, and I gotta say, the newer spots are just not as good. You must hit up the original joint, and don’t forget to get a Breakfast Club shake along side of it.
The burger is tender, the pickles are thin but have a sour/sweet quality to them that goes perfectly alongside the rich burger patty. I’m not usually a fan of a burger sauce, and this is the only burger in my top 5 that has one- but the Bebe Zito sauce is great and adds a nice sweetness to the Bebe Zito burger without overpowering it.
#4- Parlour
Most burger lovers in the metro put Parlour at their number 1 spot. This is an incredibly solid burger- super melty and creamy American cheese and pickles. The bun is toasted to perfection and holds up extremely well to the juicy burger, which has two thin but never dry patties. It is a gooey, salty burger that hits all the right notes- Parlour definitely knows what they are doing with this one and has earned the hype! The vibes at Parlour Bar are great and there are always delicious craft cocktails to be had.
#3- Saint Dinette
The Saint Dinette burger held my top spot until just last summer. I have some pretty special memories coming to Saint Dinette, sleeping toddler in my arms after a few hours running around at The Children’s museum, tucking into one of these masterpieces. This burger is stellar- it is simple again with just cheese and pickles.
What I especially love about this burger is that it has all the gooey deliciousness but somehow doesn’t feel heavy and greasy- just flavorful, crisp bun, soft patty and a nice crunch from the pickles. The most remarkable thing to me is always that the bun stays toasted and crisp until the very last bite- how do they do this?? Magic. Pure burger magic. That’s how.
#2- Petite León
Petite León was one that we stumbled across last summer, and boy am I glad that we did. Probably the lesser-known spot on my list, but an honest contender for my #1 burger, depending on the day and my mood. The big differentiator with this burger is the onions. This is made in the style of an Oklahoma Smash burger- meaning they mash thinly sliced onions onto the griddle at the same time they smash the burger patties down. This creates thin string of deliciously caramelized onions stuck right into the patties. I’m a big fan of onions, especially caramelized or griddled ones, so this makes the burger for me. On top of the onion situation, there is a fresh, buttery bun, American cheese and pickles, as usual. I could eat this burger every single day, and be so, so happy about it. Petite León knew what they were doing when they crafted this delicious masterpiece.
#1- Constantine
Constantine- the place for the dessert burger. And I don’t mean some gimmicky, sugary sweet burger topped with cotton candy or something insane. I mean the place we go, at the end of the night after already having eaten dinner, for a Dirty Double before heading home to relieve the babysitter. Because it is that good. The patties have a blend of beef and bacon, so you get a rich, smokey, fatty patty that is seared perfectly but falls apart in the best way. There is so much wonderfully balanced flavor in this burger, I have a hard time thinking of a better single bite, ever. Add to that Constantine’s dark, mysterious, speak-easy vibes, and there is nowhere else I’d want to end a fun night out. The drinks are creative and delicious, and where else can you get a 10/10 burger while relaxing in candlelight on velvet high back chairs?
So there you have it- my super, (not-so) secret Top 5 Burger list. I hope you had as much fun reading this as I had eating these burgers and then writing about it- and if you ever get the chance to check any of these places out- we would love to hear about it!
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